Seoul then RNing (not running) and Chinatown in Seoul

 In a previous post, I mentioned what it's like watching Youtube recordings of church sermons, and what effect it has on me. I recently watched Onnuri Seoul EM and thought back to a summer in Seoul studying abroad during which I attended Onnuri Seoul EM nearly every Sunday. It was such an honor to be able to attend a famous, large ministry. At home, I stopped going to VOG, the EM affiliate of the Korean Presbyterian church. I feel that I outgrew it, both in fellowship and worship. I don't think I can return to a ministry that I don't connect with anymore. 

I began to think to myself what needs does a church ministry fulfill for the individual? And, why can't I get those needs met through the local ministry at home, VOG? It's such a complicated journey because in one sense it makes me feel guilty. I feel guilty that I am not able to fellowship with fellow church goers in VOG, despite having done so in the years 2010 and 2011. Also, Emmanuel Presbyterian Church is conveniently located near Columbia University, and so it made sense to attend that church while a student, which I'm no longer, and so in some sense, I outgrew that ministry. 

However, I continue to watch Youtube sermons of both VOG and Emmanuel with enjoyment despite knowing I won't have my needs met from either in regards to fellowship. It's ludicrous and far-fetched to think that a ministry as far as away as Manhattan will meet my needs. With Onnuri Seoul EM, I'm reminded of the enjoyable moments I had back in Summer 2005 with fellow church goers there. 

It's a challenge to find the right fit, the right church ministry. I have to be realistic and practical and yet know that the church has to meet my needs as well. It's hard just watching Youtube sermons and not going to church, as I previously mentioned in another post. I'm not sure exactly what makes it harder than the regular attendance of a church, but it's hard. Innately, there's a natural need for inclusion, fellowship, and belonging, which I'm currently lacking. I think I'll eventually find the right ministry, but for now, it's just been truly lonely depending solely on Youtube sermons. 

There is some sense of excitement though when I watch Youtube sermons of churches that are new to me or bring newness to me. And, I thought about it. What aspect makes it exciting? I think it's seeing the fellowship of new faces, faces I'd never seen, that's enjoyable. 

On a more dreadful note, I have nursing homework during spring break. I've been getting around to thinking what area of nursing will be a good fit for me. I think it's med-surg. Although ED, trauma and OR is where lives are truly saved and that's where the excitement happens, I need something much, much slower paced, and that's med-surg floor. I'm not picky by any standards, so I'll take whatever job I match with after graduation. 

Reverting back to the topic of Seoul, I went to Seoul with my parents last year. We stayed a few days in Incheon, which is the town where the international airport is at. While staying in Incheon, we visited a Chinatown. I had a white sauce jjajang myun that was heavenly. It tasted so good. 

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